A newly discovered chapter in the book of Genesis has answered the question, "Where did pets come from?"
Adam & Eve said, "Lord, when we were in the garden, you walked with us every day. Now we do not see you any more. We are lonesome here, and it is difficult for us to remember how much you love us."
And God said, "No problem! I will create a companion for you that will be with you forever and who will be a reflection of my love for youi, so that you will love me even when you cannot see me. Regardless of how selfish or childish or unlovable you might be, this new companion will accept you as you are and will love you like I do, in spite of yourselves.
And God created a new animal to be a companion for Adan & Eve.
And it was a good animal.
And God was pleased.
And the new animal was pleased to be with Adam & Eve and he wagged his tail.
And Adam said,"Lord, I have already named all the animals in the kingdom and I cannot think of a new name for this animal.
And God said, "No problem! Because I have created this animal to be a reflection of my love for you, his name will be a reflection of my name, and you will call him DOG."
And Dog lived with Adam & Eve and was a companion to them and loved them.
and they were comforted.
And God was pleased.
And Dog was content and wagged his tail.
After awhile it came to pass that an angel came to the Lord and said,"Lord, Adam & Eve have become filled with pride. They strut and preen like peacocks and believe that they are worthy of adoration. Dog has indeed taught them that they are loved, but perhaps too well.
And God said, "No problem! I will create a companion for them who will be with them forever and who will see them as they are. The companion will remind them of their limitations, so they will know that they are not always worthy of admiration."
And God created CAT to be a companion to Adam & Eve.
And Cat would not obey them. And when Adam & Eve gazed into Cat's eyes, they were reminded that they were not the supreme beings.
And Adam & Eve learned humility.
And they were greatly improved.
And God was pleased.
And Dog was happy.
And Cat didn't give a shit one way or the other.
____________________ If you can't read this, you're illiterate.
