Two priests died at the same time and met Saint Peter at the pearly gates.
"Our computer's down," said Saint Peter. "You'll have to go back for a week, but you can't go back as priests. What"ll it be?"
The first priest said, "I've always wanted to be an eagle, soaring above the Rocky Mountains."
"So be it," said Saint Peter, and off flew the first priest.
The second priest thought for a moment and asked, "Will any of this week count?"
"No," said Saint Peter.
"Well, the priest said, "I've always wanted to be a stud."
"So be it," said Saint Peter.
A week later, the computer was fixed and the Lord told Saint Peter to recall the two priests.
"Will you have any trouble locating them?" He asked.
"The first one should be easy," said Saint Peter. "He's somewhere over the Rockies, flying with the eagles. But the second one could prove more difficult."
"Why?" asked the Lord.
"He's on a snow tire somewhere in northern Ontario," said Saint Peter.
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A man is not old until regrets take the place of dreams...John Barrymore
A priest & a rabbi were involved in a minor fender-bender. The priest got out of his car & made the sign of the cross. The rabbi did the same. They met to exchange information. As they were talking the priest said, "Say rabbi, I never knew they made the sign of the cross in your religion." The rabbi replied, "We don't. Why do you ask?" The preist said, "I'm sure I saw you make the sign of the cross as you got out of your car." The rabbi said, "Oh that! I was just checking to see if I still had everything...spectacles, testicles, watch & wallet."
____________________ If you can't read this, you're illiterate.
