The union workers at the Federal Mint went on strike today. They are
demanding to make less money!
"The first of April is the day we remember what we are
the other 364 days of the year." - Mark Twain
Q. What do you get when you cross a Jehovah's Witness with a Hell's
Angel Biker? A. Someone who comes to your door on Sunday and tells
*YOU* to fuck off!
Q: How do you recognize a gay Pakistani?
A: He has a red dot on the back of the head.
Q. If a movie with lesbians is named 'Fire', what would a movie with
gay's be named. A. Backfire
Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink
and drive?
Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you
turn down the volume on the radio?
Ending a relationship is just like adjusting your underwear: You feel
better when the creep is gone.
Q: Why do blondes cut the strings off their tampons?
A: So the crabs don't start bungee jumping.
If a motorist cuts you off, just turn the other cheek. Nothing gets
the message across like a good mooning.
"Why does a woman work ten years to change
a man's habits and then complain that he's not
the man she married?"
---Barbara Streisand
Some people say that I must be a horrible person, but that's not at
all true. I have the heart of a young boy. ...In a jar.... On my
desk. - - - Steven King
I sometimes get balls caught in my throat. My box smells. I can have
a little pussy. What am I?
A Cat
"Turkey has voted not to allow U.S. troops into their country and
Saddam Hussein said 'You can do that?'" -Jay Leno
If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands?
I never set out to be weird. It was always the other peoplewho called
me weird.; --Frank Zappa
