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Conductor - Tell-A-Joke - Off Topics - Team Focus - Come On In And Enjoy The Company!

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teamfocus
TF Administrator


Joined: Mon May 24th, 2004
Location: Redwood City, California USA
Posts: 4647
Year/Model: 2001 ZX3 ...
Occupation: Whatever suits me at the time!
Interests: Cars, Fishkeeping
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Status:  Offline
Mana: 
 Posted: Mon Feb 11th, 2008 03:30 am
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A little old lady is on a bus, buying a ticket from the bus conductor,
fumbling in a voluminous bag for the correct change. After 15 minutes
the conductor becomes so enraged that he hits her on the head with the
ticket-dispenser, and the poor old dear dies instantly.

Not surprisingly, he is convicted and put on death row.

Just before he is to be electrocuted, his last request is for 12
pounds
of bananas, which he devours.

They strap him into the chair, flip the switch, and he just sits
there,
smiling. According to tradition, this is considered a reprieve from
God
and he is freed.

Somehow he gets his old job back, and he is happily dispensing tickets
when he sees a girl stick her gum on the back of a seat on the bus.
Enraged, he lunges out with the ticket dispenser, breaking the
offender's neck and killing her.

Again, he is convicted and sent to death row. He again eats the 12
pounds of bananas, and lo and behold, the electricity does not harm
him.

This time the executioner cleans the contacts, makes him sit in a
bucket
of water, he tries everything - but the conductor won't die. So again,
he is set free.

Amazingly he regains his job. It takes him 1 day to lose his temper
and
beat to death a young boy who starts to chew his bus ticket. He
returns
to death row, eats the bananas, and survives the electrocution.

At this point, the executioner can take no more - his professional
pride
has been hurt. Before setting our friend free again, he asks him his
secret - what is it with the bananas?

Oh, the bananas have nothing to do with it, replies our friend. I'm
just a bad conductor.



____________________
Rick (Rokie)
rtdring@yahoo.com
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ProjectFocusFast
TF Senior Moderator


Joined: Tue Jun 1st, 2004
Location: Milwaukee, WI, Wisconsin USA
Posts: 1301
Year/Model: 2006 ZX3, 1980 RX7 ...
Occupation: Powered Industrial Truck Operator
Interests: Focii, gaming, cars in general!
Male/Female: Male
Status:  Offline
Mana: 
 Posted: Mon Feb 11th, 2008 02:02 pm
QuoteReply
 aww jeez...



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Mr. Versatile
TF Senior Moderator


Joined: Wed May 26th, 2004
Location: Ohio USA
Posts: 3211
Year/Model: '02 ZX3
Occupation: Special Ed Teacher
Interests: Cars, bicycle road racing, playing my sax.
Male/Female: Male
Status:  Offline
Mana: 
 Posted: Thu Feb 14th, 2008 02:24 am
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;ohno     :banned     ;ohno



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If you can't read this, you're illiterate.
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Team Focus - Come On In And Enjoy The Company! > Off Topics > Tell-A-Joke > Conductor


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