At work, our manager was trying to demonstrate a project on his
computer to four women in our provider relations department. He was
having problems with the computer, so the ladies went back to their
office until he could get the program pulled up. I was not aware of
any of this, so I was a little shocked when I walked in the office
door, and heard one of the ladies shouting down the hallway, "Hurry
up
girls and get in here, Al finally got it up!"
One mortician calls the other in to look at newly arrived
body. "Hey,
Joe! You've got to see this shit.", says Chester . "You know that
good
looking blonde they just brought in… well she has a shrimp stuck up
her cunt" "This I've got to see." responds Joe. After examining
the
body Joe says, "That's not a shrimp Chester." "It's not? Well what
the hell is it?" asks Chester. "It's her clit." says Joe. To which
Chester replies, "Well it sure tastes like shrimp."
A man returned home from the night shift and went straight up to the
bedroom. He found his wife with the sheet pulled over her head,
fast
asleep. Not to be denied, the horny husband crawled under the sheet
and proceeded to make love to her. Afterward, as he hurried
downstairs for something to eat, he was startled to find breakfast
on
the table and his wife pouring coffee. "How'd you get down here so
fast?" he asked. "We were just making love!" "Oh my god," his wife
gasped, "that's my mother up there! She came over early and had
complained of having a headache. I told her to lie down for a
while." Rushing upstairs, the wife ran to the bedroom. "Mother, I
can't believe this happened. Why didn't you say something?" The
mother-in-law huffed, "I haven't spoken to that jerk for fifteen
years, and I wasn't about to start now
